It's a beautiful day for bitching...

Yeah, yeah, I have no excuse. What can I say, I've been a busy bee and I do have a life outside of the addictive other world known as the Internet. A million apologies now, and a trillion apologies for the future.

With that said...let's get to bitching :)

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*Okay...so I do a little grocery shopping at the new Super Target near my home. Of course, it's typical Target: 3:00 in the afternoon, 18 registers, and only 2 of them open. There are lines going into the candle aisle. Ridiculous, I say. Eventually, another register opens, and I rush over to use it, but alas, I am beaten by a behemoth with a cart full of crap (read: Hot Pockets, Wonder Bread, Redbook Magazine, etc...). Normally, I'd be annoyed, but I was in no rush, and decided to pass the time by reading a nearby tabloid. I enjoyed the guilty pleasure for all but 5 seconds before Queen Beast begins her mooing:

QB: "I just want to know...the grocery section is on [the east] end. Why do you only have registers open here?" ("Here" being the area between the grocery department and the home/garden department)

cashier (looking and acting like she wants to get this elephant the fuck out of her line): *shrug* "I'm sorry, I don't know."

QB: "Well, it's just more convenient to have registers near the groceries. Some of us don't feel like walking all the way over here."

cashier: *continues to scan Moo Cow's groceries*

QB: *whine*moo*hee haw*

cashier: *scans the crummy groceries at a fantastic speed*

QB: "Say, is your supervisor around?"

**And before you can say "Bitch, try jogging!" a young go-getter who is going to climb that Target career ladder, boy howdy, appears with his eager face, ready to help all his breeders in need.**

Poor Schmuck: "Yes, ma'am, how can I help you?"

QB: "Well....(goes on the same diatribe about how much of a lazy shit she is and how she can't stand to go more than 10 steps without collapsing and gasping for air. I eat Hot Pockets, don't you know how inactive and unhealthy we are?! Give us special treatment!)

PS: *smile quickly fading from his face* Riiiight. I apologize for the inconvenience, ma'am. I'll let the manager know of your concerns.

QB: "Hmph." *and with that she waddles away, but not before holding up a line of now 8 people with her bitching*

me: *under my breath* It's not like she can't use the walk.

cashier: *quietly* I know, right? LOL


I didn't mean for anyone to hear that, but...oh well.

But come on! I mean, really...come...on. No wonder the world thinks less of us. The entire store is not even close to 1/5 of a mile wide! I think you can handle walking a little (with the help of a loaded cart, no less) to the middle of the store from one side. If you would drag your cankles once in a while, then you'd have no reason to bitch so much! Put down the Pork Pocket, and do some fucking jumping jacks, you sow!

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It's an exciting time for animal rights! Vegetarian and veganism is becoming more and more popular, what with gaining more ground in the mainstream market. Now more than ever, we can enjoy cruelty-free accessories, clothes, and food. And speaking of food: lab-grown meat. That's right. According to the latest issue of VegNews magazine (if you don't already subscribe, you should. It's a wonderful publication), researchers hope that by 2020, lab-grown meat will be available in supermarkets. The deal is: it is real meat, which is used not by killing an innocent animal, but by using its cells. The process wouldn't be entirely innocent: animals still would be used in some way, but they would not be slaughtered, and we're hoping that they will be treated humanely. So, it's win-win. Omnivores get their meat, and in turn, hundreds to thousands of animals could be spared.

Well, imagine my discontent when I mention this news to several of my meat-eating friends. I heard the following replies:

"Yeah, but if real meat is still available, I'm going to choose that." (Whatever "real" meat means...as if the lab-grown meat would be imaginary)

"Yuck! That sounds gross." (As if eating chicken fetuses and drinking bovine mammary juice isn't.)

"I don't know, SD. It seems so...artificial." (Keep in mind, this is coming from someone who thinks nothing of downing Sunny Delight--yes, it is delicious, I admit, but I digress--and eating Totino's pizza, which is, quite possibly, the foulest convenience food in existence. But I suppose that's for another blog ;) )

So I say: "So...even though an alternative, which would be real meat, will be available, you'd still choose to eat the meat of a murdered animal?" Not one said anything in favor of the lab-grown meat. Typical.

Normally, I don't judge people on how they eat. At this time, the way a person lives/eats is his or her own damn business. And I will feel the same way in the future. But I can't help but feel sorry for them. I can understand that the whole "lab-grown" deal is a little new and unusual, and may take some time to get used to. But it's also important to have an open mind and to at least educate yourself before making ignorant, judgmental comments. And let's not forget the compassion---get some, assholes.

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Okay, enough preachin'...more bitching to come :)